Senilism at its very best

Dear Satan,
As a great admirer of yours, here i have a gift for you. I know you have been lonely for quite sometime, and i felt pity that you have to jack off alone at night. Therefore i present you, a Wife!! Behold!!!

I found this lady in my uni. She fits your criteria. Mean, ugly looking, very very high ego, like to eat children, cant accept that someone is better than her and alot more. I just can't name all her specialities because i'm gonna get a heart attack by doing that. Anyway i met this evil during my 1st semester in my uni.

We were having our MUET group discussion that time. My friends whom are also my close friends since i was 13, warned me about this evil. They say she's against Indians. Heard some big shit happened few years back. Bare it in mind that this Evil is also an Indian. So yeah back to the story, she was in the room with 4 indian guys (including me) doing our MUET discussion or test (i forgot). So we gave our points for the discussion. All of our points were spot on. But, being an itchy ass and indian hater as she is, she said none of our points are accurate.

I can bet you guys, that same points i presented, will give me an A in my exams. But no, she disagrees, especially with the points i presented. I dont know why she hates me so much. Maybe because i'm handsome or smart, i dont know. As i mentioned, she hates people who are better than her. So she started with her nagging, how we are not concentrating in class, how we are so noisy bla bla bla. I kept quite at that time because i wasn't in the mood to talk. Then she told me this heartstabbing words, "I hate to have a son like you." She told me that!

Bitch. If i knew that this evil's gonna be my mother, i'd kill myself before birth. I might drown myself in the water bag or strangle myself with the umbelical cord or something, i don't care. I mean, who the fuck are you to tell me that? When she told me that, i swear i was gonna jump on the table and give her 2 hard slaps and bring her down to earth. What she said was basicly insulting my mother. Fucking senile lady. Take care of your family, leave mine alone. Look at your sons. What faggots you made out of them.

So then everything went cool and 2 sems pass by. This sem, which is my 3rd, my group entered a drama competition and we marched to the finals. We were the very 1st Engineering group to make it to the finals of this Drama Fest. We were excited. Very excited. The group i'm with is brilliant. I've never seen such hardworking, enthusiastic and dedicated people in my 22 years of life. Kudos to you guys.

So the morning before the final, we were practising in Main Hall (where the drama is suppose to be held). As normal, we practised. Then one of our crew members saw a guy who was recording us. We went to confront the guy and told him to delete the pic. He said yeah so we was on our way back. Then that guy started provoking us, saying "You Engineering students are this and that, always complaining, not satisfied bla bla bla.." (by the way, that guy is in Law and his Law group were the favourites to win this competition. And he wasn't recording with a camera phone, it was a camcorder allright). I got pissed the way he provoked us and shouted back, "Fuck off!! Son of a cunt!" Yeah i was pissed allright.

I really didn't thought that these people were gonna go back and complain to their lecturer. I mean come on we're all teenagers, and this things happen in daily life! So yeah they complained and guess what, the lecturer is The Evil!!! That evening, while we were still practising in the hall, she came up to the stage and start firing our manager. The way she fired this poor girl was so brutal and hard, that she reminded me of Charles Manson. I thought she was gonna slaughter the girl right there on the stage with her pen. Fuck!

I couldn't take it when the Evil was firing our manager so much and didnt gave her a chance to response back, i went up the stage. I told our manager to sit and this is what happened next:

Me : Ma'am you are not suppose to do this.
Evil : Did you hear what i said?
Me : Look at her. Obviously anybody will know what you said to her.
Evil : (In her growl and eyes staring at me that looked like its gonna shoot laser through my eyeballs) GET LOST!

So thats what really happened. One of my friend pulled me down and the next thing i know, we got 2nd place in the drama. So ok everything settled and we went back home. And next morning, we met our lecturer, only to learn that The Evil has sent her an email. Damn. These evils already know how to operate the computer. So yeah she mentioned to us quite a few stuffs.

We were laughing our asses out while listening our lecturer reading us the mail! It was funnier than the Sardar Joke books! The Evil mentioned quite a lot of senilistic stuffs, such as how we were practising until 'wee' hours for the drama, how 3 big sized indian guys came up to her students and said bad words to them, how I came up to her like a thug and shouted at her eventhough she's nearly 60. Let me response to this ( i dont care if any of you cocks not gonna believe this):

Firstly, we didnt practise until the wee hours. We didnt even practise until 2 days before the final. We did our props 2 hours before the drama. Thats it. And even if we do, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THAT? Why can't we practise till wee hours? Does your heart stop when we practise? Does winning the competition mean so much to you? Ok go ahead. Take the trophy and the money. We're not doing this for the money. We're doing this because its fun! Thats it. And The Evil mentioned that 2 of her female students saw us practising till wee hours in front of the field. Let me tell you this, we did practise in front of the field. Until 10 pm max. If you call that wee hours, i'm Elvis Presley. 2 female students? We didnt see any 2 female students there. Maybe they are you imaginary friends? Senile old lady with 2 imaginary friends.

2nd point, 3 big sized Indian guys came up to her students. This shows how much she hates Indian guys. And her students were taken aback by what we said. AWWWWW! Such little kittens. After today, i'm gonna treat the Law students as gently as possible. They're sensitive. I promise i wont say any harsh words like 'stupid' or 'fool' towards them. I can't imagine if I call them dumbasses. They might kill themselves. The only thing i got to say here is GROW UP!

3rd point, how I came up to her like a thug and shouted at her eventhough she's nearly 60. Who in the blue fuck are you to call me a thug? You're not my mom. You're not my friend. Your just shit with flies flying around you. Thats it. It pisses me off when she mentioned my name. It burns. Shouted at you? What the fuck did i shout? "You're not suppose to do that?" Pfft. 60 years old lady? Your suppose to be supportive, not eating us up! Why? Does that bring pleasure to you? Huh? Act like a 60 year old la! You're my grandmother's age for goodness sake! Retire lah! Gonna die anytime soon! Retire la!

I cant believe that they're still such people living in the world. I thought these creatures died during the Dinosaurs age? Damn. Please retire! Please i beg you!

And also kudos to our drama group. The biggest thanks and hugs goes to our lecturer, for all her support and hardworks in guiding us into finals. I thank you all. And also the supporters!!